Soccer season over, great year.

Today was the last game of the soccer season with soccer appreciation afterwards.  David had a good season and he really loved the coaches and team mates that he played with this season.  He enjoyed it so much that after the game he asked if he could play winter (indoor) soccer.  We are happy that he found a sport that he likes and we will see what we can do about finding an indoor team as all the extra experience would be great for him in learning to grow and learning the game better.  We are also so grateful that he had such a wonderful coaching staff and made a lot of great friends who all worked as a team and helped everyone together.  That kind of coaching needs to be recognized as David learned a lot and had a lot of fun growing with the team this season.  As a team they waited until today's game to finally pick up the win however they had a great time every game and put it all on the line.  With this experience we are hoping that he will continue to enjoy the sport and grow with it as it is proving to be a positive thing for him.

Our day at the Apple Cider Festival and reuniting with old friends

This weekend is the Lordstown Apple Cider Festival and David has been going since he was born and entering his vegetables since he was three, accumulating many awards.  This year Jack got to enter some things too.  They each entered for "largest pumpkin," "flower grown by me," and "vegetable (tomato) grown by me."  After the entries we then came back home for lunch then went back for the car show and to check to see if their entries won any prizes.  My wife brought her Nikon camera with her and David took pictures of the cars and took some great angle shots, much better than I could have done.  My wife coached him a little but on most of them he took them himself and I will try to post them later.  After the car show we then went back over to the building where the boys' items were entered, the craft show was also going on at that time.  They each received awards for their flowers and vegetables and David received one for largest pumpkin however Jack's didn't (although it was as big as David's and the only one entered in his age group).  We walked around for a little bit and checked out the photography, culinary arts and quilt show which is held in the library of the building.  David took pictures of the puzzles that were entered and he ran into a few of his friends/former classmates.  While we were in there the librarian, whom was also the judge, noticed David and me and made it a point to talk with us.  She told us "I seen you in the paper and kept thinking to myself 'I know them' but couldn't remember where from, then it struck me that I see you every year at the festival and I know your (my wife's) aunt."  She then proceeded "I just wanted to let you know that I am very proud of what you have done to stand up for your son, I know it took some courage and I wanted to let you know that you did a great thing raising awareness on autism."  She then asked if everything got resolved and if anything happened to the coach so we told her as much as we knew on the situation.  We don't really know much on the situation and most of what we know is rumor.  We have not been in contact with the L.A.C to follow up on anything and we haven't been in contact with most of the team either but what we do know is that the coach was suspended from the championship game and we believe that was all he was punished as we believe he is still coaching.  David is playing soccer this season in which their fields are right next to the baseball fields.  The L.A.C has a "Fall Ball" league and after David's last soccer game we had to drive past the baseball fields to get home and there was a game being played on field one and as we looked over it appeared that Shawn Phillips was standing in the first base coaches box coaching the game, so it appears that the only punishment he received was that one game suspension.  I hope that harsh punishment taught him a lesson.  Anyhow back to today's events,  we walked around the craft show a little more.  As usual Jack said hello to everybody and we met, or reacquainted with, many new people.  While we were looking at different tables we ran across one that had dish scrubbers and dish rags and David insisted that he needed a scrubber and Jack likewise believed that he needed one so I decided to let them each get one, perhaps they may help out with the dishes but that seems unlikely.  I bring this up because I think it is very unusual for a 9 year old or 3 year old would request something like that.  We then left the building and headed over to the midway where the cider was being pressed and picked up a gallon for us and a gallon for grandma then went to grandma's for dinner with the intentions of going back to see the fireworks.  After dinner and a visit with the grandma and grandpa we then went back up to the festival, grandma gave the boys each five dollars to ride a couple of rides before the fireworks began.  When we went back David had a little mini reunion with a lot of his former classmates.  We returned with a little bit of time left before the craft show building closed so we decided to go back in there real quick because there was a table about autism in there that I spotted earlier but didn't show my wife at the time so I told her about it but by the time we went back in they were gone but the other people set up were still there.  While we were walking around Jack said hi to another person and without seeing me she told him "you look so much like your dad."  I looked to see who she was as to how she knew who I was and I could not recognize her and the situation was awkward, as most situations are when the person remembers me but I have no recollection at all of them.  She asked "don't you remember me?" then gave a little back story on how I should know her but I still didn't remember, even after she told me who she was I still did not remember who she was.  That's the way I am, unless you have a huge impact in my life, or I've had an extended acquaintance with a person I can not remember who you are as I am not good on facial recognition.  A similar incident happened later on walking on the midway when a former co-worker of mine came up to me and started talking with me and I did not remember who he was either.  As I stated earlier we ran into a lot of David's former classmates and team mates and the parents of them and most of them asked about the situation of baseball so we told them what we knew.  Almost everywhere we turned there was another kid saying "hi David" and seemed excited to see him again, but the one most excited was a girl that was on his tee-ball team, soccer team and most of his classes in school.  David also seemed excited to see her too.  That is the one thing that I'm going to miss the most about the small community and school is that everyone knew everyone and they were all friends and although David no longer goes to school with them they still love him and treat him as if he never left.  David has made new friends at his new school but he misses his friends from his former school.  Many of the teachers also commented how much they miss David and this is what I am hoping for him to accomplish at his new school, to make many friends and have an impact on the teachers.  Yes the school year is still new but even in the short time, based on some e-mail replies, the teachers aren't living up to what his former teachers have demonstrated in regards to schoolwork and learning habits and I am hoping that will change before the end of the year, if not we may have to try to open enroll him and move him back but that is something for later.  Back to the festival, The boys each got enough tickets to ride 4 rides each, David rode on the spinning ride once and the pirate ride three times.  Jack was not big enough to ride those rides, although he wanted to very badly, so he had to settle for the smaller rides.  After the rides we then let the boys spend the rest of their money on a game and some candy and a drink while we waited for the fire works.  The fire works went off at ten and lasted twenty-five minutes and the boys decided to sit on the hood of the car to watch them and they loved them.  With the conclusion of the fireworks we then came home and although Jack and Max were passed out, David was still wide awake.  I brought Max in first and put him in his bed then Jack to his bed and David was still awake and not tired.  Since David wasn't tired I decided to make him up a multiplication test and time him to get it done hoping that would make him tired.  I gave him seven minutes to complete it and he had a minute to spare and got them all correct, this did not make him tired though, he then went up to his room and began reading his book to put himself to sleep, he was reading until 1 a.m. before finally falling asleep and that was the extent of our day. 

School, two weeks down, homework still a struggle but classwork getting better

Two weeks of school (8 days due to the holiday) over.  Homework is still an issue but I assume he's doing better completing assignments in school as he is not bringing home as much work as he was in Lordstown for not completing it in class.  For the most part his homework has been in math.  He is good in math and know the answers but it is hard for him to get the answers from his brain, to his hand, and then onto the paper.  It has taken him a couple of hours to complete the homework every night and he gets frustrated because we don't want to let him do anything (visit grandma, watch TV, play outside) until it is done.  He is distracted the whole time while doing his homework because he is thinking about what he's going to do when he finishes it.  The outside noises are also a distraction and so are his two little brothers.  On Wednesday he moved about 5 different times trying to find a quiet spot to do his homework.  He has a desk in his closet to do his homework and it's generally quiet in there but on that day Max was fussing, the air conditioner was on and the neighbor was mowing his grass.  He was extremely overwhelmed and frustrated and kept moving, to find a quiet spot, it was about 5:10 pm and he was only half done but we had to leave to make it to his soccer game so he had to finish when he got back home.  We arrived back at home around 7:30 and fed him and then made him finish his homework and he had it finished around 9pm.  He was so tired when he finished it that he set it at the foot of his bed and forgot to put it into his binder and he forgot it at home which made him upset because he took all that time to complete it.  Luckily the teacher let him hand it in a day late.  Aside from homework though he seems to be doing good in class.  Yesterday he had a spelling test and a math test.  He received a 101% (all 20 words plus bonus word correct)  and he also received an 'A' on his timed math test.  At this point the only main concern that we have is with his language arts class.  There are three different classes; 1,2 and 3.  David is in 1.  Classes 1 and three have the same spelling lists whereas Class 2 has a slightly harder list, which we are assuming is the "advanced" class.  When we were reviewing the lists David said "these are first grade words" so we had him spell thee extra five words that are on the "Class 2" spelling list and he spelled those too.  David has been tested and is reading at a seventh grade level and his spelling is impeccable, sometimes his mom has him spell words for her.  This is David's first year at this new school and it's understanding that they don't know him, and due to his IEP that he has in place that is most likely the reason that he wasn't put in the advanced class.  We did express our concern with the language arts teacher and she said that she let the principal know the situation and they are going to set up a meeting between her, the school counselor, the principal and us to discuss what is best and see where we go from there.  I hope they can move him to the other class because if he continually has lists like these and moving at a slower pace I think that he will get extremely bored and they may lose his interest and that's the last thing that we want to happen.  They explained that his schedule correlates with the special education schedule that way if he ever needs help then he can go there.  We would rather David struggle and be challenged than to move at a slower pace and get left behind.  We hope that we are doing the right thing and we believe that we are.  Although David has an IEP in place he is very intelligent, sometimes he just needs a little extra time to finish his work because of the processing delay that takes extra time for him to get the words from his head to the paper.  If he were still at Lordstown I'm sure that he would be challenged because the teachers and staff there had four years growing up and getting to know him so they know his strengths and weaknesses but since this is his first year at LaBrae the teachers and staff didn't have that privilege of getting to know the student, David.  We believe that in a few months they will get to know him better and learn him but he needs challenged now before he gets too far behind.  Just remember that no one knows your child better than you as a parent, so whatever you believe is best for your child make sure that you push that issue and let it go from there.

Finally read "Look me in The Eye" by J.E. Robison, this is my take from it

I finally read the book "Look me in The Eye-My Life With Asperger's " by John Elder Robison.  It was a great read and I noticed that a lot in his book reflect a lot of David in his young life and a lot of me.  There are many differences in between our cases too.  What struck me first was about when John's younger brother was born he stayed by him and gave him a nickname of Snort but then his brother outgrew that nickname so he had to change it to Varmint.  David never really gave his brother a nickname but he calls him other names besides based on the circumstances.  David was really excited when Jack was born and loved him and talked to him and taught him a lot.  Jack then started walking, then talking and at that stage David started to get a little annoyed with him, he didn't give him a nickname like Varmint but he often thinks of him that way.  Although Jack gets on David nerves sometimes David still loves his little brother and teaches him things everyday, as what I got out of John's book that's the same situation he had.  According to the book John used to like to use his brother as a test dummy and David seems to like to do that with his brother too.  David now has another little brother named Maxwell whom is eight months old now and he loves to talk baby talk to him and hold him and teach him things too.  While my wife was pregnant with Max, David said "I can't believe I was excited to have this little brother that turned into a disaster, and now I can't believe I'm excited to have another little disaster."  He also often jokes "Please don't drop Max on his head, we don't need another Jack."  Although both of his brothers can annoy him at times he still loves them but only when he wants to.  One difference between John Elder and David is that John's father was an alcoholic and David's isn't, however my father was an alcoholic which I believe led me away from it.  I'm not going to lie, I do like to enjoy a monthly beer but nothing to make me unstable or unpleasant to be around as I can do that without alcohol.  The thing that I share with John is that we were both diagnosed later in life, John was 40, which was much older than me at the age of 27 however I believe for both of us it would have been easier growing up if we knew of our disorder.  David was actually diagnosed before I was.  According to the book John did poorly in school although his extreme wealth of knowledge and if it weren't for David's early intervention and the school stepping in and notifying us in Kindergarten, his diagnosis may have been overlooked and would have the same problems in school.  David's gym teacher was the first to address the issue of his processing delay and from there we pushed for testing and received the diagnosis and was able to establish an individualized education plan (IEP) which gives him extra time to complete his work in school and allows separate settings for testing in a quiet room due to his sensory issues.  If this information had been available during John's time then he may have not been looked at as defective and would most likely have finished school.  Me on the other hand I enjoyed school for the most part.  I didn't make many friends although I had some but I enjoyed the attention from the teachers and I made it a point to excel in my work because I knew that teachers liked good students.  I also found homework and any schoolwork challenging and relaxing at the same time.  Despite my grades, a lot of my actions made me look like an outcast and a bad child, I spent many times standing on the wall during recess because of my behavior in class and I have also been suspended from the bus a few times and a couple times from school.  Later on in the book I can relate to the story based on the jobs that he went through, according to the literature up until he started his own business he was in and out of jobs and didn't really hold down a gig for longer than two years.  As for me my longest tenures were in the U.S. Navy for three years and then three years working for a refractory company, all the other jobs I had lasted an average of 9-12 months.  The constant job change is mainly due to my inability to adapt with the social settings around me.  I am also confrontational at times when I see things are not being done according to procedure, being performed unsafely, or if I see an easier way to do a task.  A lot of employers don't like the creativity as they think I am looking at it that they may have not thought the process through correctly in which is not the case.  The other co-workers also tend to have a problem with that because they think I am downplaying them, or it makes me look arrogant in which is also not my intentions.  Since my diagnosis last year I have been going to counseling on a regular basis to try to cope with these issues and try to adapt to the social surroundings, however helpful this may be I still tend to struggle in some areas as I am unable to read facial expressions and I don't really catch on to sarcasm.  This book gave me an insight both at his life but also made me think back on times in my life and the observations that I've seen in David's young life.  I really enjoyed reading the book and I encourage anyone with asperger's or autism; or have a connection to it in any way such as a child, sibling, cousin or student, to read this book as it may answer many questions.  My wife convinced me to read it and I put it off for a few months but now I'm glad that I read it and now I'm about to start on his book "Be Different" which I hope to be just as fun filled.