I finally read the book "Look me in The Eye-My Life
With Asperger's " by John Elder Robison. It was a great read and I
noticed that a lot in his book reflect a lot of David in his young life and a
lot of me. There are many differences in between our cases too.
What struck me first was about when John's younger brother was born he stayed
by him and gave him a nickname of Snort but then his brother outgrew that
nickname so he had to change it to Varmint. David never really gave his
brother a nickname but he calls him other names besides based on the
circumstances. David was really excited when Jack was born and loved him
and talked to him and taught him a lot. Jack then started walking, then
talking and at that stage David started to get a little annoyed with him, he
didn't give him a nickname like Varmint but he often thinks of him that
way. Although Jack gets on David nerves sometimes David still loves his
little brother and teaches him things everyday, as what I got out of John's
book that's the same situation he had. According to the book John used to
like to use his brother as a test dummy and David seems to like to do that with
his brother too. David now has another little brother named Maxwell whom
is eight months old now and he loves to talk baby talk to him and hold him and
teach him things too. While my wife was pregnant with Max, David said
"I can't believe I was excited to have this little brother that turned
into a disaster, and now I can't believe I'm excited to have another little
disaster." He also often jokes "Please don't drop Max on his
head, we don't need another Jack." Although both of his brothers can
annoy him at times he still loves them but only when he wants to. One
difference between John Elder and David is that John's father was an alcoholic
and David's isn't, however my father was an alcoholic which I believe led me
away from it. I'm not going to lie, I do like to enjoy a monthly beer but
nothing to make me unstable or unpleasant to be around as I can do that without
alcohol. The thing that I share with John is that we were both diagnosed later
in life, John was 40, which was much older than me at the age of 27 however I
believe for both of us it would have been easier growing up if we knew of our
disorder. David was actually diagnosed before I was. According to
the book John did poorly in school although his extreme wealth of knowledge and
if it weren't for David's early intervention and the school stepping in and
notifying us in Kindergarten, his diagnosis may have been overlooked and would
have the same problems in school. David's gym teacher was the first to
address the issue of his processing delay and from there we pushed for testing
and received the diagnosis and was able to establish an individualized
education plan (IEP) which gives him extra time to complete his work in school and
allows separate settings for testing in a quiet room due to his sensory
issues. If this information had been available during John's time then he
may have not been looked at as defective and would most likely have finished
school. Me on the other hand I enjoyed school for the most part. I
didn't make many friends although I had some but I enjoyed the attention from
the teachers and I made it a point to excel in my work because I knew that
teachers liked good students. I also found homework and any schoolwork
challenging and relaxing at the same time. Despite my grades, a lot of my
actions made me look like an outcast and a bad child, I spent many times
standing on the wall during recess because of my behavior in class and I have
also been suspended from the bus a few times and a couple times from
school. Later on in the book I can relate to the story based on the jobs
that he went through, according to the literature up until he started his own
business he was in and out of jobs and didn't really hold down a gig for longer
than two years. As for me my longest tenures were in the U.S. Navy for
three years and then three years working for a refractory company, all the
other jobs I had lasted an average of 9-12 months. The constant job change
is mainly due to my inability to adapt with the social settings around
me. I am also confrontational at times when I see things are not being
done according to procedure, being performed unsafely, or if I see an easier
way to do a task. A lot of employers don't like the creativity as they
think I am looking at it that they may have not thought the process through
correctly in which is not the case. The other co-workers also tend to
have a problem with that because they think I am downplaying them, or it makes
me look arrogant in which is also not my intentions. Since my diagnosis
last year I have been going to counseling on a regular basis to try to cope
with these issues and try to adapt to the social surroundings, however helpful
this may be I still tend to struggle in some areas as I am unable to read
facial expressions and I don't really catch on to sarcasm. This book gave
me an insight both at his life but also made me think back on times in my life
and the observations that I've seen in David's young life. I really
enjoyed reading the book and I encourage anyone with asperger's or autism; or
have a connection to it in any way such as a child, sibling, cousin or student,
to read this book as it may answer many questions. My wife convinced me
to read it and I put it off for a few months but now I'm glad that I read it
and now I'm about to start on his book "Be Different" which I hope to
be just as fun filled.
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