Thursday, September 6, 2012

Finally read "Look me in The Eye" by J.E. Robison, this is my take from it



I finally read the book "Look me in The Eye-My Life With Asperger's " by John Elder Robison.  It was a great read and I noticed that a lot in his book reflect a lot of David in his young life and a lot of me.  There are many differences in between our cases too.  What struck me first was about when John's younger brother was born he stayed by him and gave him a nickname of Snort but then his brother outgrew that nickname so he had to change it to Varmint.  David never really gave his brother a nickname but he calls him other names besides based on the circumstances.  David was really excited when Jack was born and loved him and talked to him and taught him a lot.  Jack then started walking, then talking and at that stage David started to get a little annoyed with him, he didn't give him a nickname like Varmint but he often thinks of him that way.  Although Jack gets on David nerves sometimes David still loves his little brother and teaches him things everyday, as what I got out of John's book that's the same situation he had.  According to the book John used to like to use his brother as a test dummy and David seems to like to do that with his brother too.  David now has another little brother named Maxwell whom is eight months old now and he loves to talk baby talk to him and hold him and teach him things too.  While my wife was pregnant with Max, David said "I can't believe I was excited to have this little brother that turned into a disaster, and now I can't believe I'm excited to have another little disaster."  He also often jokes "Please don't drop Max on his head, we don't need another Jack."  Although both of his brothers can annoy him at times he still loves them but only when he wants to.  One difference between John Elder and David is that John's father was an alcoholic and David's isn't, however my father was an alcoholic which I believe led me away from it.  I'm not going to lie, I do like to enjoy a monthly beer but nothing to make me unstable or unpleasant to be around as I can do that without alcohol.  The thing that I share with John is that we were both diagnosed later in life, John was 40, which was much older than me at the age of 27 however I believe for both of us it would have been easier growing up if we knew of our disorder.  David was actually diagnosed before I was.  According to the book John did poorly in school although his extreme wealth of knowledge and if it weren't for David's early intervention and the school stepping in and notifying us in Kindergarten, his diagnosis may have been overlooked and would have the same problems in school.  David's gym teacher was the first to address the issue of his processing delay and from there we pushed for testing and received the diagnosis and was able to establish an individualized education plan (IEP) which gives him extra time to complete his work in school and allows separate settings for testing in a quiet room due to his sensory issues.  If this information had been available during John's time then he may have not been looked at as defective and would most likely have finished school.  Me on the other hand I enjoyed school for the most part.  I didn't make many friends although I had some but I enjoyed the attention from the teachers and I made it a point to excel in my work because I knew that teachers liked good students.  I also found homework and any schoolwork challenging and relaxing at the same time.  Despite my grades, a lot of my actions made me look like an outcast and a bad child, I spent many times standing on the wall during recess because of my behavior in class and I have also been suspended from the bus a few times and a couple times from school.  Later on in the book I can relate to the story based on the jobs that he went through, according to the literature up until he started his own business he was in and out of jobs and didn't really hold down a gig for longer than two years.  As for me my longest tenures were in the U.S. Navy for three years and then three years working for a refractory company, all the other jobs I had lasted an average of 9-12 months.  The constant job change is mainly due to my inability to adapt with the social settings around me.  I am also confrontational at times when I see things are not being done according to procedure, being performed unsafely, or if I see an easier way to do a task.  A lot of employers don't like the creativity as they think I am looking at it that they may have not thought the process through correctly in which is not the case.  The other co-workers also tend to have a problem with that because they think I am downplaying them, or it makes me look arrogant in which is also not my intentions.  Since my diagnosis last year I have been going to counseling on a regular basis to try to cope with these issues and try to adapt to the social surroundings, however helpful this may be I still tend to struggle in some areas as I am unable to read facial expressions and I don't really catch on to sarcasm.  This book gave me an insight both at his life but also made me think back on times in my life and the observations that I've seen in David's young life.  I really enjoyed reading the book and I encourage anyone with asperger's or autism; or have a connection to it in any way such as a child, sibling, cousin or student, to read this book as it may answer many questions.  My wife convinced me to read it and I put it off for a few months but now I'm glad that I read it and now I'm about to start on his book "Be Different" which I hope to be just as fun filled.

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